David Caruso - RED II - the bore continues...

We are always in awe when we read various "fan-magazines" and "fan-letters".
Some are so juvenile to the point where one feels nauseated every time one reads it. Carefully avoiding the really interesting things - mostly juicy private details - about their object of desire the authors entangle themselves in endless eloquies about movies, TV-shows and anything else but.
Was the first issue of RED nothing to write home about we have to say the second one falls into the same category.
We would title it "the big yawn".
So many really interesting things happened between the first and second issue of this "fanmag" that got ignored.

• One is Caruso moving/evicting his children and their mother from their home to make room for his latest sperm receptacle.*
• Or the noticeable on-set rift between David Caruso and Emily Procter most likely due to David Caruso's unbearable diva behavior...*

Looks like these topics are a tad too uncomfortable for the author to write about.
Well, don't you worry. We will cover those subjects as often as we can. After all, this is the really interesting stuff. Stuff that keeps people interested.
So, can we recommend RED Issue 2?
Only, if you want to die of sheer boredom....Thank God it doesn't come in print. Otherwise, it would make a good toilet-paper..
David Caruso
Links:
*http://davidcarusorevealed.blogspot.com/2008/11/david-caruso-globe-exclusive_26.html
*http://davidcarusorevealed.blogspot.com/2008/10/david-caruso-guess-who-is-at-it-again.html

David Caruso - A big zero

(click on picture to enlarge!!!)

Since those comic-pictures are so widely popular right now we decided to make one of our own...just for fun

VOILA!

We think we did great....

David Caruso

David Caruso - Caruso's de-evolution as actor

Gems like the following tidbit are brought to our door-step by our many readers regularily . Thank you, folks!:

....I love love love, plain ol', almond-free CSI. I think it's one of the best dramas to have ever aired. That said, I dislike CSI: Miami.It's boring. It's a pretty lifeless hatchet job of a script/series. I just can't get past David Caruso, he gives me the creeps.

I think everyone's right about Caruso's de-evolution as an actor. I thought he was great on NYPD Blue during it's first two seasons, but on CSI:Miami, he's resorted to the same "sidestep > steely glare > toss out one-liner > put on sunglasses" routine a few too many times now. ...

Found on:

http://www.tvsquad.com/2005/12/06/convince-me-to-watch-it/#comments

David Caruso

David Caruso - WHAT? No pre-signed autograph-cards?

What happened?

Is David Caruso not feeling well?

Or has he temporarily run out of presigned autograph-cards to hand out?

Or was Caruso just taken off guard and simply forgot to take them with him?

We simply don´t know.

However, for once David Caruso didn't bother people - in this case the owner of the location where they were shooting CSI Miami episode "Smoke gets in your CSI's" - with that strange habit of his.

Must be a first. Well, wonders still do happen, don't they? LOL!

Found on:

http://www.robgreer.com/blog/2008/11/csi-miami-selects-our-studio-2/

David Caruso

David Caruso - Nightmarish...

Blogged by another disenchanted viewer...Icon of Idiocy David Caruso disappoints over and over again...

...Now I'm not a big CSI fan in general, but I will concede that the original CSI is very watchable and can see why people have gotten so hooked on it. The characters work well together and you actually care how they end up.
CSI: Miami though has me wishing that the lead David Caruso /HoCaine would meet his untimely demise by virtue of some sort of horrible woodchipper accident.
David Caruso delivers every line like it's life or death, a form of over-acting that's only surpassed by William Shatner.
And combine that with writing that obviously has come from the finest that an elementary school has to offer...

.... a complete nightmare...WE KNOW!

Found on: http://justson.blogspot.com/2008/11/why-i-hate-csimiami.html
David Caruso

David Caruso - Biggest Douchebag of the Universe

Just too good to miss therefore copied and posted as a whole:

...Icon of Idiocy David Caruso is quite possibly the biggest douche bag in the world, and I know douche bags.

I never understood all of the hype surrounding him. I remember when NYPD Blue premiered a hundred years ago.

I was barely out of womb (or in my early teens), and clearly recall that his ugly mug graced the covers of tons of magazine. Even at that tender young age, I was mystified by his popularity.

He’s a red headed freak,

• he can’t act to save his life,
• and he’s not attractive.
• How does a guy like him make it in Hollywood?

One of life’s little mysteries.
He decided to leave NYPD Blue to pursue a film career. Bad move on his part. That decision was akin to eating fast food everyday because you plan on losing weight.

His film career didn’t go as planned, which was a blessing to those of us that didn’t care for him in the first place.
Fast forward several years and suddenly he’s on CSI Miami. What makes matters even worse is that the show took off and he’s popular again.

WHY?? Someone explain this to me!! How can you take this show have fans? I just don’t get it...

WE DONT GET IT EITHER...

Found on:

http://twoliablog.com/the-catherinette-chronicles/2008/11/28/david-caruso-douche-bag-extraordinaire/

David Caruso

David Caruso - Reasons why people prefer NCIS over CSI Miami...

Lately, we spent some time with an avid NCIS fan. We asked her WHY she prefers NCIS over CSI Miami .
We got the following answers ...

"....No David Caruso. Praise our God! *does happy dance*"
*
"...Did I mention that there is no David Caruso?"
*
"...Forensics is just a cool subject in general. Unless David Caruso is involved.."
*
"..While I was stressing how gorgeous DiNozzo is and how much I hate Caruso.."
*
"Yay! for the lack of David Caruso. The man can't act. Bleach.."
*
"...no David Caruso is a serious incentive for feeding my crime fetish :-)!"
*
"And David C? Um yeah. Droppy dog face and paperbag personality. UGH..."

Do we really have to say more...??

Found on: http://rebeccaryan.blogspot.com/2007/06/thursday-13-18.html
David Caruso

David Caruso - David Caruso and Plabnox

Making fun of Icon of Idiocy David Caruso has become an artistic deed. Some are good, some are better and some people are EXCELLENT.
See picture above.

Guys, you rock!

Above: The highlight of the fete: Noam Chomsky's speech extolling the virtues of Plabnox Cures. David Caruso, leading man in multiple Plabnox Cures posts, reclines upon the opulent stage while Shuffles looks on from behind the podium.

*

Found on:

http://plablognox.blogspot.com/2008/11/plabnox-gala-2008.html

David Caruso

David Caruso - Finally, there is hope!

The following Icon-of-Idiocy-David Caruso-spoof was masterminded by satirepatch.(http://satirepatch.blogspot.com/2008/11/david-caruso-will-receive-bailout-money.html.)
Upon reading it the first time, we knew we had to add it to our collection. It is hilariously funny!

ENJOY!

..DAVID CARUSO, AN INDIVIDUAL WHO HAS SQUINTED AND STAMMERED HIS WAY INTO FAME, will receive no less than 16 million dollars of federal bailout money to underwrite acting lessons.
Although the current administration has resisted the pressure to help Caruso, pressure from increasingly assertive Democrats has led to a pledge for a special rider to the current bailout bill which will pay for acting lessons.
Speaker Pelosi explained why: "I come from a state where the entertainment industry brings in billions. Everyone else's amusement is our bread and butter. And now that things are getting tougher in the real world, people no longer think that Caruso's make believe 'acting' skills are cute anymore. The whole Zeitgiest is all about getting back to basics and being for real; nothing is more illusory than Mr Caruso's theatrical talent, yet his third rate acting is causing real damage to the industry's bottom line."
Insider's close to the administration elect say that Obama is particularly disturbed about how Caruso's mediocrity is hurting America's image abroad. Our source spoke frankly about a meeting with the cabinet in waiting where the president elect laid it on the line insofar as his thoughts on the ginger headed thespian: "I want something done about Caruso"
Obama is said to have stated. "When people in other countries see that man set up as someone who is talented and worth watching, it makes folks abroad question the basic judgement of our average citizen. Caruso is a threat to national security. Either get him acting lessons, or give him a cabinet post where he will do a lot less damage."
Those attending the meeting have aparently chosen the former option....

ROFLMAO!
David Caruso

David Caruso - David Caruso's helping hand

We couldn't help but laugh upon reading the newest interview from the CSi Miami set.
Latest addition Echikunwoke fills Khandi Alexanders shoes not quite. Apart from being just a tad too young she is just not a very believeable in the role as coroner.
Anway, TPTB recuited Echikunwoke to do a little song and dance and praise Icon of Idiocy David Caruso. Because that is what the lead actor with the rotten attitude needs the most: good press.

Upon request (we are sure about that) she delivered the following amusing blurb:

@

....Caruso also gave Echikunwoke a hand with getting into the Miami groove. "He also helped me sort of find the tone of the show because he was sort of instrumental in creating it, so who better to sort of lead you in the right direction than him?" ....

@

We do wonder WHERE else David Caruso lead the ethnic looking women. After all, we all know he has a roaming eye for dark beauties...

Found on: http://www.csifiles.com/news/241108_01.shtml

David Caruso

David Caruso - Warning: this TV-show contains David Caruso!

CSI Miami starring Icon of Idiocy David Caruso a drama?

No way.... says one prolific blogger .....it is the Funniest Sitcom ever (hidden inside a drama)!:

....Hands down the funniest dramas on television are on CBS, my home for unintentional comedy. The tip top, hip pop, clip chop, quip cop of the crop is of course C.S.I. Miami.
The star of the show is David Caruso, hands down the best straight man straight man in the business. The business I’m speaking of, of course, is the Extreme Over-Acting Business. Which I hear is a tough business to watch usually.

Ninjas, of course, have a form of over-acting that can induce annaferristic shock, which we do by putting on performances that are so horrible that people are unable to move…and then we kill them.

But, Caruso gives us a run for our blood money. He speaks at roughly 4 words per minute and has yet to ever actually look at any actor who has been in a scene with him. And, when you roll all that Carusalafragilousiexpedalidociousness up in a ball with the most unbelievable (as actors or crime scene investigators) cast the show becomes offensively hilarious.

Aside from the laughable hot factor, I haven’t seen less facial movement since I went to see the Country Bear Jamboree concert at Disneyland.

I’m a big fan…of musical furred mammals, not doll-like stillness. I have to assume they shoot all of the actors in the face with botox before each take.

It’s creepy.

Funny creepy.

Like vampires. ....

Found on: http://www.fancast.com/ourtvpicks/?p=11

David Caruso

David Caruso - Why Do YOU Hate David Caruso?

Of course we know, that there are many, many reasons to hate Icon of Idiocy David Caruso. One fellow bloger sums it up nicely:

...I hate his stupid fake raspy voice as he takes his glasses off and looks at the ground to say something cheesy! .

He talks to his shoulder.

He is a beanie eyes red head.

He thinks he is hot shit when we all know he is dogshit.
He over acts.
Futher, he's always playing the "tough guy" role. Is it just me or is there a problem with some scrawny, middle aged, red head trying to imtimidate people?

Ugh. I hate the guy. Horrible horrible horrible actor!...

*

...don't we all?

Found on: http://www.sportsline.com/mcc/messages/chrono/11658452/0/0/11659627#ID11659627

David Caruso

David Caruso - Irritatingly Annoying

A fellow blogger asked her readers what show they prefer: Law and Order or CSI Miami.
A couple of people answered. Not surprisingly, their opinion was unanimous when asked about Icon of Idiocy David Caruso:

"....Also the main guy ( David Caruso) in CSI Miami is a horrible actor.."

"...I will watch again if / when David Caruso leaves the show. I hope his sunglasses break. How irritating. the puns. and slow motion removal of his sungl es are a cheap gimmick. and irritating."

".....mainly because David Caruso's acting is irritating as hell ."

"....Caruso can't act - he is just too wierd."

What can we say...The people have spoken and the people are always right, LOL!....BTW L&O won by far!

Found on:

http://lawyer-corner.com/chats/post/44-show-csi-miami-law-order.html

David Caruso

David Caruso rubs people the wrong way.

A TV-viewers/bloggers plight:

....I can barely stand watching David Caruso act. His acting is just so Shatnerian with his over-reliance on dramatic……… pauses when speaking and idosynchratic body language.
And that sunglass thing is just a joke at this point. He just comes across as very arrogant in a way that rubs me the wrong way.
I also dislike CSI:Miami because, much more than the other CSI shows (which I don’t mind watching), the secondary characters seem like nothing more than one-dimensional foils for Icon of Idiocy David Caruso/Horatio Caine to display just how smart and intuitive he is.
While the other two CSI’s show a lot of teamwork, CSI: Miami might as well be called CSI: David Caruso.
I don’t like it… one bit....

Found on:
http://markandeya.wordpress.com/2007/02/21/enough-with-the-sunglasses/
David Caruso

David Caruso's 15 Minutes of Fame Quadrupled

The washingtonpost.com cleary is our winner in the category "funniest blurb of the day".
Like always, we were in search for eligible material for our blog.
After some time we stumbled upon the celebrity column by Liz Kelly were we found the following:
@
Nob Hill: Liz: Not sure I understood the David Caruso stalker story -- are they looking for someone to stalk him? Because depending on how much it pays I'd be interested.

Liz Kelly: No, no -- you must've misread the headline. David already has a stalker, she's just gone missing. Which prompted the AP to headline their story "Alleged Caruso Stalker Sought on International Warrant." I can see how that might've gotten your hopes up.

Man, who stalks David Caruso? What, was Don Johnson full up?
@
Found on:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/discussion/2008/10/24/DI2008102401037_pf.html
David Caruso

David Caruso KNOWS he sucks!

Just too good to not to add to our blog:

You know they say....."Self-knowledge is the first step toward (self-) improvement"..
Ain't that the truth, DAVE!
And you are right of course....because YOU REALLY DO SUCK...!!!

*
Source http://funtobebad.blogspot.com/2008/11/ultimate-truth-2.html
David Caruso

David Caruso - P. Diddy is in the house!

We have to admit we are in awe of the hum-drum the news that Rapper Sean (P. Diddy) Combs guest-stars in CSI Miami causes. Since one week search-feeds daily offer countless entries about the black Mogul's signing up for a short guest-stint on the franchise.

One is tempted to think that this cameo might be something special - instead of what it really is: a PR-gag to raise the shows declining viewer-numbers.

Anyway.

We don't mind P. Diddy. He is a very clever and talented guy

However, we do wonder how Icon of Idiocy David Caruso might feel about the fact that the cameo appearance of someone who is so much more sucessful than him takes up all the media-interest. After all, we all know how much diva Caruso likes to be the center of attention.

Of course, P. Diddys screen-time will be a lot less than Caruso's. The scenes between those two will be short and sweet with Caruso having the last word.

We haven't seen P. Diddy acting - yet . But who knows, maybe he is another guest-star who upstages Caruso.

Like so many before him...

David Caruso

http://ontherecordmag.wordpress.com/

http://www.starsjournal.com/2502/diddy-will-be-a-guest-star-on-csi-miami.html

http://www.xxlmag.com/online/?p=30245

David Caruso - Same shit...worse actor

We have no words.

This is so funny and oh, so true. After watching last nights' episode "Gone, baby, gone" many people may have been thinking the same.

We don't know what the writers have been smoking that they present us with shit like that. Or what Icon of Idiocy David Caruso might have been drinking to give an outrageously bad performance like that.

*

You'll find an indepth recap of the above mentioned episode on: http://community.tvguide.com/thread/Csi-Miami/Csi-Miami-Gone/800049594

*

Picture courtesy of: http://9one.blogspot.com/2008/11/honest-tv-titles.html

David Caruso

David Caruso - Irrelevant

What can we say? Other than that the following comment exactly echoes our opinion:

".....It requires no actual work, and it's journalism at its laziest. You can interview Joe the Plumber as often as David Caruso drops witty one-liners and doffs his glasses on CSI: Miami, and that doesn't make either of them relevant...."

Found on:

http://heartsinthemargins.blogspot.com/2008/11/only-political-post-youll-ever-see-me.html

David Caruso

David Caruso - "Caruso-esque"

If somebody talks about Icon of Idiocy David Caruso one obviously means hamfisted, bad acting, a gigantic ego and a rotten attitude to boot.
The red menace can be proud.
We are sure, in years to come Caruso will not not be remembered for his talents (or lack thereof). He most likely will be remembered as being the reason the Internet-community created a new term - "CARUSO-ESQUE"

What does this "word" stand for?

Our educated guess is that it stands for people behaving in an extremely exaggerated and annoying manner. For people with a lot of attitude but little to no talent to justify it....just like David Caruso!

A few examples?

"....instead of him walking away in a David Caruso-esque way."
"....but a pair of sunglasses turns him into a David Caruso-esque asshole (jeez, is it even possible to watch CSI:Miami un-ironically?)"
"...."C.S.I." rip-off crime show, channeling reptilian Carusoesque pausing."
"....any David Caruso-esque fantasies of ditching prime time for a movie career."
"....usual more overtly dramatic Caruso-esque interpretation."
"....his bizarre hair and his silly-tough-guy delivery are very Caruso- esque."
.....

We think you get the drift!
David Caruso

David Caruso - Picture of the week

Alerted by numerous readers of our blog we searched for and found the above picture. We think there is no need for us to add much - the headline says it all. And believe us - a truer word was never spoken!

*

Honestly, what would Icon of Idiocy David Caruso be without his famed props?

Answer - Just another talentless ugly ginger!

*

Source: http://funtobebad.blogspot.com/2008/11/ultimate-truth.html

David Caruso

(Click on picture to enlarge!)

David Caruso....the simple truth...

We have to thank a fellow blogger for the following most inspiring words:

"David Caruso..he talks to the ground and looks at people sideways...I hate that.

CSI Miami ....Bad acting and hack writing all in one maudlin pie. I watch this show because there is nothing else on at that time . It would be a hell of a lot better if David Caruso wasn't such an asshole..."

found on http://www.tomtoo.cn/csi-miami-69176-1-1

Ain't that the truth? LOL

David Caruso

David Caruso - NewsBusted!

It is always great fun to find blog-entries and videos that spoof Icon of Idiocy David Caruso.
The following is a visual master-piece by the talents of a comedy-show called NewsBusted (http://newsbusters.org/blogs/nb-staff/2008/11/14/newsbusted-2-18)

Nothing like a good laugh first thing in the morning, right?

Enjoy! http://www.eyeblast.tv/public/checker.aspx?v=e4qGqGkUaG

David Caruso

David Caruso - Dumb arrogant idiot

Nothing like the open and honest opinion of a viewer on Icon od Idiocy David Caruso :

"...I watched his (David Caruso) biography (A & E) not too long ago and do you know that only one person from any of his shows or movies talked about him on-camera? Rex Linn from CSI: Miami is the only one to say anything about him.
My Mom thought it was wierd but I said that maybe the rumors of him being hated were true and that's why you don't see anyone else .That alone tells you something.
If you watch the biography you can tell what an arrogant @$$hole he is. He's a sh!tty actor who thinks the world revolves around him when in fact life goes on better without his ugly a$$. What a dumb arrogant idiot. To bad someone doesn't point out to him that he's not all that good..." (posted by MulcahysGirl)..

Found on:
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000325/board/thread/114708080?d=122734482&p=5#122734482

" ...maybe the rumors of him being hated were true ...." THEY ARE, mulcahysGirl, they are!

David Caruso

David Caruso - Only sixty seconds..

CSI Miami - You see, it has morphed from a disastrous, insulting failure — into possibly the most overwrought, over-the-top, hilariously ridiculous spectacle since… I don’t know.

The Piltdown Man? Any Cirque Du Soleil show?

This show is so awesomely misguided and bizarre and campy that it could only top itself by having everyone perform in drag. And I feel bad saying that, because I have friends who are drag queens, and I don’t want them to feel insulted.

..Every time I’ve been subjected to even sixty seconds of CSI: Miami, I’ve found myself wondering

(a) how its existence is justified,

and

(b) why someone (anyone!) hasn’t sent the gift of actual acting lessons to David Caruso.!

Found on: http://q.queso.com/archives/2006_09

David Caruso

David Caruso - Kicking David Caruso!

Wouldn't we ALL like to do that - once? Only once?
What?
Kicking Icon of Idiocy David Caruso's scrawny pasty white ass! Only to think about is already makes us smile. Until that happens we at least can kick his ass verbally (and with us many many fellow bloggers) :

....I was never a fan of the CSI: Miami shows but now I watch the first few minutes of each just to see the gruesome special effects and laugh. David Caruso has got to be one of the worst and most annoying actors on television.
The so called strong character he brings to the show .
The robotic movement ,the one-liners .
I guessed that would sum up an "excellent actor" ,...hmm, I never thought of that . Just tilt your head ,take off /on shades ,and say one liners ...
No wonder they drop-kicked his ass from cinema back to the swamp of t.v. where he first grew....

Found on:
http://joebrainardspyjamas.blogspot.com/2008/11/i-want-to-remake-fight-club-where.html
David Caruso

David Caruso - P.Diddy vs. David Caruso

It is a small sensation.

Rap personality, Sean Combs also known as P. Diddy will make a cameo on television soon. The Grammy and MTV Video Music Awards winner has been picked up to guest star on CBS's hit police drama series, "CSI: Miami".

Acting is nothing new for this American top rapper because he has appeared in Jon Favreau's 2001 film, "Made", as Ruiz. He also won a starring role in Broadway play "A Raisin In The Sun". (http://www.aceshowbiz.com/news/view/00019847.html)

*

So far the press-releases .

*

What we know about P. Diddy is that he is a great musician , producer and designer. Everything he touches turns into gold. He is successful on every level (What a startling difference to David Caruso LOL!)

We don't know much about his qualities as an actor. Or how big/important the role is the writers and producers of CSI Miami intended for him. Regular viewers of the show know that sometimes guest-stars outshine the cast by far.

Whatever will be the case one thing is for sure - P.Diddy can't be worse an actor than David Caruso. Come to think off, NOBODY is worse than Icon of Idiocy David Caruso!

David Caruso

David Caruso - Ginga bogle

There is an old saying that fine feathers make fine birds. However sometimes even those "fine feathers" can't hide the obvious lack of talent and charisma.

Whom we are talking about?

Icon of Idiocy David Caruso of course!

We are sure, if they would dress up a cardboard figure in Versace, Armani and Boss and put it into the scene hardly anyone would notice any difference.

For all those who have the urge to wear the same things Davie Caruso wears on the show - can take a look at:

http://www.seenon.com/television/cbs/csi-miami/character/horatio/

David Caruso

David Caruso - Behavior patterns

Another CSI Miami episode without a David Caruso/Emily Procter-scene. It has been roughly 8 months since both actors had a scene together. Looks like there is not much love lost between Icon of Idiocy David Caruso and co-star Emily Procter.

What caused the rift?

Was it David Caruso's obnoxious behaviour that enraged the petite Southern girl?
*
Was it David Caruso's rotten attitude that made it impossible for her to work with him?
*
Was it David Caruso taking himself way too seriously (as he always does) that caused his co-star to be miffed?
*
Unforgotten the article on Defamer* describeing how Caruso curses, spitts, and demands. Could those people all be wrong? We highly doubt that.
Even if one or the other blogger desperately tries for damage control by putting the blame on Emily Procter or accusing people of being wrong.
What may be seen as dedication and hard work by fans , may be seen as maniac behavior by others. Judging by what we have read in articles we found on the Internet the majority thinks David Caruso is the one to blame for the rift.

We most certainly agree.

Does David Caruso always have to be the center of every episode? We wouldn't mind if Caruso's acting would be watchable. But with the uninspired, snoozing performance he gives every week he annoys us if nothing else. And don't start us on his ugly careworn mug....

WE counter - the heart of this estrangement is not Emily Procter . The "primo" actions of Icon of idiocy David Caruso are evident in every episode and in every word the he mumbles.

David Caruso
http://defamer.com/367763/david-caruso-what-should-i-do-i-am-a-grown-man-with-red-hair
http://defamer.com/363863/david-caruso-bullies-young-director-into-shooting-umpteenth-sunglasses-removal-scene

David Caruso - Demented orange crested bird

Last nights episode was short of a big yawn....which reflects in the reviews and opinions of various bloggers. Not unsurprisingly (and well deserved) it is Icon of Idiocy David Caruso who bears the brunt of the snark, laughter and critique:

....Caruso's odd lack of affect continues to grate. And the camera practically bows down before Caruso as if he were Sir Laurence Olivier, with absolutely no good reason whatsoever.

Show, I don't care how much Florida sunlight you try to filter over Caruso, he's a totally unconvincing actor and so far I can't see one shred of star quality. Caine just stands around in rooms, unemotive, not saying much, and not even able to deliver a good dose of Schwarzenegger-action-movie-style irony convincingly...(antmoose)

We hear you!

Found on:

http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?showtopic=3179218&pid=11024357&st=0&#entry11024357

David Caruso

David Caruso - Like a pig w/o lipstick

We hold the opinions of other bloggers in very high esteem. Like the following noteworthy blurb on Icon of Idiocy David Caruso and CSI Miami:

"....CSI Miami has always been a poor spin off of CSI and even CSI NY managed better. David Caruso/HoCaine is the main reason the show sucks. Unlike CSI's Grissom and CSI NY's Mack, this guy only knows how to kneel down, tilt his head at an angle and remove his sunnies.

He doesn't do anything in the lab.

His delivery of lines are simply lame.

I find myself watching Miami only when I cannot get CSI or CSI NY . I suspect the sunglasses have more talent than that loser.."

Found on: http://howhardcanitbe-ed.blogspot.com/2008/11/csi-addict.html

We most certainly AGREE...

David Caruso - Dissecting David Caruso

Lisa de Moraes is a Washington Post TV columnist . She is online regularily to dissect and take questions and comments on the networks' announced fall lineups.
We like Lisa a lot....especially when she is dissecting Icon of Idiocy David
Caruso:

**************
Tassler said :"We do very well with our procedurals but we've added more character to them." Can this be surgically performed on David Caruso? Will he get reassigned permanently to Brazil?

Lisa de Moraes: Maybe flashbacks, and they'll hire a very young actor to play the part? I'm guessing here because, honestly, I don't think the technology yet exists for grafting character on to David Caruso's performance...
**************
Found on:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/discussion/2008/05/11/DI2008051101909_pf.html
David Caruso

David Caruso - Batshit crazy Caruso!

Radiohost Mike Evans....zeroes in on Icon of Idiocy David Caruso.....and we are LOVING it!!!

"...I have ignored this story for a couple years, but since everybody is talking about what a jerk and nut David Caruso is, why shouldn’t I? There are so many crazy stories about Caruso, here are just a couple of my favorites.....

Ready?

* Once he tried to insure his stupid sunglasses for $1 million, but was told since they are mass made and cost only $100 it couldn’t be done!

* When on the set of CSI he pays a food taster, because he believes jealous cast members might try to poison him.

*And my favorite, that David Caruso once sent a letter to the Emmy board of Governors telling them never to consider him for an award, that it wouldn’t be fair to his other co-star actors. Sounded like he (really)believes he is so much more talented than all the others it wouldn’t be fair!..."

Found on: http://evansradio.com/blog/?m=200803.

David Caruso

David Caruso - "Who needs viewers?" and other blurbs...

We had a fairly entertaining week. As usual it was one or the other David Caruso fan that took the biscuit!

* A prolific blogger of TV Guide posted an article titled"CSI Miami: Viewers' discontent". It is a very interesting summary, depicting how viewers feel in light of the unbelievable/ridiculous scripts, the bad acting - which seems to worsen with every season- and the allover bad quality of the show. Not surprisingly, a somewhat delusional David Caruso/CSI Miami fan delivered a rant to defend the show. Among her more or less inane blurbs was the following comment:
"...What's the big deal that they have 'lost some viewers?..."
-....Millions. They lost millions of viewers . Well, sweetheart - no viewers = no show = no job for a third rate actor like David Caruso. We'd say it is a VERY big deal.
(http://community.tvguide.com/thread/Csi-Miami/Csi-Miami-Viewers/800049131)

* The onging rift between David Caruso/Emily Procter is a hot topic on many fan-boards. After all, it has been more than 8 months that those two had had a scene together. Gladly we link to the following interesting article:
http://community.tvguide.com/thread/Csi-Miami/Csi-Miami-Legit/800049164

* Fun-poll "Labelling David Caruso! What is the MOST fitting?" is closing on November 11, 2008. Cast a vote if you haven't already .
http://www.zimbio.com/David+Caruso+REVEALED/polls/12/results/Labelling+David+Caruso+MOST+fitting

...poem of the week:

* Ode to Dave...ever wanted to read a poem about David Caruso or need a thought-provoking impulse before writing one? Well, you can find it on:
http://davidcarusorevealed.blogspot.com/2008/11/david-caruso-applied-arts.html
David Caruso

David Caruso - Worse than porn-videos!

Upon reading the following blurb re: Icon of Idiocy David Caruso we immediately knew we had to add it to our blog. The analogy is so hilarious that we just couldn't let it pass. Sorry folks!:

....I end up watching at least two episodes of CSI Miami and keep wishing that David Caruso was a better actor .

Caruso needs acting lessons. In fact, everyone on that show does. I've seen better acting in porn videos..(er, or so I'm told).

Caruso is just easy to target (and difficult to ignore) because he really MILKS the camp to the hilt. If you asked me though, Caruso actually distracts the fact that the writing is so over-the-top and the acting is terrible for all 3 series to begin with. ...

Found on:

http://onemoredyingquail.blogspot.com/2007/11/visual-crack-proof-that-david-caruso.html

David Caruso

David Caruso strikes again?

The discussion around the apparent lack of scenes between David Caruso and EmilyProcter on CSI Miami is alive and well.
A multitude of questions surface and resurface over and over again. The one that is asked the most is:

When did Caruso and Emily last have a scene together?

This blogger offers a valid explanation to the rift between David Caruso and EmilyProcter which is so obvious that it can't be hidden anymore:

"....I felt at the end of the article that Caruso LIVES (not just acts) a double life.

He lives the life of Horatio on set, and then he lives the life of Caruso at home. Caruso really admires Caine and obviously wants to embody what he feels are Horatio's heroic qualities, but I think the two lives bleed into each other.

Thus, with this type of loss of perspective, fogging or loss of barriers, I think his fellow actors would pretty much give him wide birth. Given the timing of the H/C burn out, I'm pretty sure, Proctor just felt she didn't need to be around that kind of confused energy anymore--kinda creepy if you think about it. Guessing here that Caruso didn't take much to that distance/rejection, and maybe got cool himself. ..."

Found on: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0313043/board/thread/122146810?d=122150947&p=1#122150947

The article in question:

http://davidcarusorevealed.blogspot.com/2007/04/caruso-nutcase.html

http://ausiellofiles.ew.com/2008/10/blind-item-hot.html

David Caruso

David Caruso - Monotone 101

For the crew of "Comedy Inc.," sketch comedy isn't just fun - it's business! After three successful seasons the gang returns for another season of social/political satire and uninhibited physical comedy. The show has previously won the distinction of "Best TV Variety Program" at the New York Festivals two years in a row!

Of course, they also did a scetch/spoof on Icon of Idiocy David Caruso which we have the great pleasure to presenting you on this blog. It is called "The David Caruso School of Acting" and one of the best/funniest Caruso-spoofs that we have come across so far.

ENJOY!!!!

http://de.youtube.com/watch?v=8NCTUwfTq2I

Information on "Comedy Inc": http://www.ctv.ca/servlet/ArticleNews/show/CTVShows/1064337256697_59746356/

David Caruso

David Caruso - Hairy matters

It has come to our attention that many bloggers have been noticing/commenting on Icon of Idiocy David Caruso's akward hair-style in CSI Miami season 7 and about his receeding hairline in general.
Like it or not GINGA is slowly going bald. Most definitely, his hair has seen better days:

....What is up with David Caruso's hair? I can suggest a great silk-based product that will give his hair some control and keep it from looking like baby Jack-Jack from The Incredibles. Caruso cocks his head so that you can't see his receding hairline as much in the tight shots...

Well observed....

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http://mywomanchronicles.blogspot.com/2008/11/allergies.html#comment-form

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David Caruso

Link: http://davidcarusorevealed.blogspot.com/2008/10/david-caruso-decomposing.html

David Caruso - Easy to laugh at, but not easy to watch.

Elissa Bass loves all things television. She runs a daily TV column in The Day to find out what's in reruns, what's new, and what reality show will save us all.

And she has her own very unique opinion about CSI and Icon of Idiocy David Caruso in particular...we liked it so much that we decided to bring it to the attention of our many readers/visitors...ENJOY!:

...I love CSI, I have right from the get-go, from Day One when Grim Gil Grissom, he of the tiny feet and love of maggots, appeared at a crime scene in Las Vegas.

As deep as my love is for the original, that is as deep as my distaste is for Miami. And yes, I blame David Caruso. Entirely. Check out the clips on YouTube that pay homage to the ridiculousness of Caruso’s overarching overacting.

I simply can't bear to watch David Caruso in anything. He has his Jack Lord moments (remember him from Hawaii 5-0???). He couldn't act either and basically allowed filming of ONE side of his face. David Caruso is hilarious because he talks like he's half dead. He is easy to laugh at, but not easy to watch.

He is horrible.

David Caruso's posturing and preening--it's like he waits a beat after saying his lines, listening to applause he hears only in his head.....

Found on

http://www.theday.com/re.aspx?re=cf63e690-2cab-484d-8228-62e40fd9d938

Thank you Elissa, for making our morning...

David Caruso

David Caruso - If less is more.....

..... than this guy (Icon of Idiocy David Caruso) got more talent than anybody! (Comedy inc.)

...David Caruso moved on to this show (CSI Miami) where thanks to the success of Vegas CSI he got a fan base that all ready existed. CSI would have never made it if he (Caruso) was the guy instead of William Peterson on Vegas.

And chances are when Laurence Fisburn replaces Peterson on CSI Vegas that he will out do Caruso hands down.

And as it goes to say, Gary Sinise is a great choice for the CSI NY. Sinise is a solid actor and you can see the differences between Caruso and good actors like Sinise and Peterson. They deliver cheesy cop lines but they don't come crazy cheesy and over acted. Caruso destroys it....

We hear you......LOL!

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http://hightenreport.blogspot.com/2008/11/are-you-crazy-csi-miami-cbs-not-telling.html

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David Caruso

David Caruso....Ewwwww....

This is so short, so sweet and oh so true....

David Caruso(CSI Miami).....

His manner of speech is more alien than Yoda and Treebeard the Ent has greater skills as an actor than David Caruso.I guess the definition of "sexy" is being the first man to show your butt on tv, no matter how you look. Arrogance on HGH!

Found on: http://thatnewadage.blogspot.com/2008/11/i-dont-get-it.html

David Caruso

David Caruso - “El Posturitas”

This very cute description/blurb is courtesy of fellow bloggers from Spain. It speakes for itself. We are ecstatic to be able to add two new terms to the growing list of labels for Icon of Idiocy David Caruso!

Personajes insoportables

David Caruso/Horatio Caine (CSI: Miami): También conocido como “El Tiranosaurio” o “El Posturitas”, Horatio no me resulta insoportable por su forma de ser, si no por lo poco creíble y sobreactuado de su personaje. Tal vez David Caruso debería buscarse un sitio entre los culebrones sudamericanos.

(Google Translation:)

Unbearable characters

David Caruso/Horatio Caine (CSI: Miami): Also known as "The Tyrannosaurus" or "The Posturitas," Horatio is unbearable for his way of being, the overacting and the little credibility of his character. Maybe David Caruso should find a place among the South American soap operas.

GREAT IDEA!

Found on:

http://capuvision.wordpress.com/2008/11/04/personajes-insoportables-i/

David Caruso

David Caruso - Taking advantage

The rumors/signs pointing into the directon of a friction between David Caruso and Emily Procter have been around for a while until they couldn't be ignored anymore.
(Ausiello! http://ausiellofiles.ew.com/2008/10/blind-item-hot.html)

Now even fans on the CSI Miami Community Board realize that it most likely is Icon of Idiocy David Caruso who may be the main reason behind the problems between the two actors:

"....Well I suppose it's true that rumors have been around for awhile, but they kinda surround him (Caruso). I followed his career for awhile and I've read interviews where he admits that he can be somewhat difficult. That has followed him since his NYPD Blue days. I guess when you get to a certain level as an actor/entertainer you sort of earn the right to have things a certain way. He is the nucleus of that show so maybe he flaunts it a bit, and I'm only speculating not trying to spread rumors. Caruso certainly wouldn't be the first Hollywood actor to take a little advantage..." (meamee)

Nor would it be beneath Caruso to mob other actors! What a stellar human being!

Found on: http://www.cbs.com/forum/posts/list/24404.page
David Caruso

David Caruso - Ausiello, PerezHilton and other stuff.

This has been an interesting week. Meaning: LOTS to snark, laugh about and point at .......

*Ausiello clearly outed Icon of Idiocy David Caruso in his latest blind-item as the culprit behind the David Caruso/Emily Procter-friction. Regular viewers of CSI Miami have noticed a long time ago the lack/absence of scenes between the actors. Now we know WHY! Shame on you David Caruso! You are a DINK! (http://ausiellofiles.ew.com/2008/10/blind-item-hot.html)

* Stalker-news : Obviously, a judge has issued an International arrest warrant for the woman in question. For two days it made the rounds on the Internet. Anyway, if nothing else the whole sordid story garnered a small media-blitz. Which meant invaluable free publicity for David Caruso. (We are sure he didn't mind!) Even PerezHilton couldn't resist commenting:
(http://perezhilton.com/2008-10-28-you-want-a-piece-of-him-take-a-number)

* Comment of the week delivered by a visitor of PerezHiltons page:
".....ew, he (David Caruso) reminds me of that creepy teddy bear i had when i was a kid, the one where you put a tape in him and he would tell a story. to stalk or not to stalk, this one is for sure a not to stalk....LOL! "
(http://perezhilton.com/2008-10-28-you-want-a-piece-of-him-take-a-number)
...also the picture of the week (http://img.perezhilton.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/wenn9307732__oPt.jpg)

* There is also a new poll re: David Caruso/Emily Procter friction. As always, you have 3 options. Take your pick and vote! We already did!(http://www.zimbio.com/David+Caruso+REVEALED/polls/16/results/Obviously+Emily+Procter+mightely+pissed+David)
David Caruso

David Caruso - Idiot in Charge

Making fun of Icon of Idiocy David Caruso always was and always will be one of the top-priorities of this blog. That man is a walking and talking desaster.

Everbody who ever has watched CSI Miami or read blurbs from the set, knows that David Caruso is a man without manners or style .

One of his most annoying schticks: David Caruso walking away from conversations in that irritating way that he does.

Now someone has cut and pasted the best scenes and edited it that way that makes it look like Caruso's falling over continously - seriously, it looks like he has an inner ear problem. (Congrats to the unknown artist for his good work!)

Pretty hilarious, if you ask us!

@

The video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BKNSVQSILaE

@

Source: http://sidura.livejournal.com/38340.html?view=76996#t76996

David Caruso

David Caruso - David Caruso annoys me!

CSI'S GEORGE EADES is our hero! At least after reading/watching the interview he gave the French press. The very talented actor who plays Nick Stokes on CSI will always be in our hearts after making a comment like this:

"David Caruso annoys me!"

But then WHO isn't annoyed by the Icon of Idiocy!

To read the original French article plus Video please go: http://www.programme-tv.net/news-tv/divertissement/3192-interview-george-eads-les-experts-las-vegas/

Our Google translation:
George Eads (CSI): "David Caruso annoys me"
is eight years since Nick Stokes, a specialist in the analysis of hair and fibers of all kinds in CSI. George Eads was the guest last June of Television Festival of Monte-Carlo.
We met a man 38 years charming, funny, especially with a good dose of lucidity that is too often lacking in players to success! He explained simplicity in how it spends its money (luxury cars and motorcycles are caught his cute), his desire to film (that is not won, as he points out) and comes at a small passage breaking rule of David Caruso, his colleague roux of CSI Miami! In short, we are in love ...
Watch this interview with George Eads...

GEROGE, you are wonderful! Thank you! We ALL are annoyed by the red-menace....
David Caruso

David Caruso - ASSLESS!

One picture a thousend laughs.

One comment a waive of laughter.

Thats the way we felt when we came across the following comment which is about - you may have guessed it from the title - about Icon of Idiocy David Caruso's little impressive rear-end.

@

"Another inch would have cracked the mystery.The mystery of whether he (David Caruso) has an ass or not. Personally,I think he raised his ginger brows too high one day and his ass fell off. No one wanted to pick it up (ICK!).Hence,he remains assless.(DOUBLE HA!)...."

(posted by Jeannie on

https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=8669420350711701160&postID=1447927754580136620&isPopup=true

@

You go girl!

David Caruso

Link: http://davidcarusorevealed.blogspot.com/2008/11/david-caruso-mingy-butt.html

David Caruso - A super-douche

There have been some reports that Icon of Idiocy David Caruso is kind of a dick. There have been even more reports that David Caruso is a mega-huge dick. Supposedly, the guy re-writes all of his scenes and when he screws up his lines he blames all the other actors and show-making personnel.
It's pretty lame.
There has also been anonymous reports that Caruso isn't afraid to drop the F-bomb in front of a few child actors now and then.
And-OH NO-he's been known to hack up an awesome snotty loogie from time to time.
His most famous line?
"I'm a grown man with red hair. What am I supposed to do?" Only it was delivered like this: "I'm...a grown man...what...WHAT...am I supposed to do?"
Then there is Caruso's penchant for one-linery, glasses wearing situations, and walking out of frame for no reason...... IT'S CALLED ACTING, PEOPLE. ...Oh wait, it's not. Well, in a way it IS acting, it's just the weird kind. ......

So ...based on Caruso's abysmal acting and even worse personality, which involves corrupting children and spitting on things, we gotta label this guy a:
A Douchebag. A super-douche.

Found on: http://www.campussqueeze.com/post/Douchebag-Report-Card--David-Caruso.aspx
David Caruso